Gabrielle Nykol (lilgabbymac) wrote in girlfighters,
Gabrielle Nykol
lilgabbymac
girlfighters

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I have been accused of favoritism. Crappity!

Ok, so there is a much deeper dynamic going on with in my school right now, because there is a much deeper dynamic going on in my life, all of which is completely craptastic, but the big and the small of it is, my wife and I broke up, I am the one who ended our partnership and a few of my higher ranks, one in particular has been acting as if I broke up with her as well. 

Let’s see if I can make this horribly dramatic story as short a possible so I can actually get to the problem in my class.


[read on...]

As we have established my wife or partner (whichever term makes you feel better) and I broke up, we had been together eleven years, she started karate under my teaching and has received her third dan just recently.  She is well known in my class. 

Another of my students started at the same time as my wife for the past couple of years has been flaky in coming to class, occasionally disrespectful and painfully abuses her rank and has to constantly be reprimanded for treating the lower students with no respect.  Over the time she has been in karate we had become friends then the friendship faded and jealousy set in.  In the past couple of years she has been accusing me of favoritism.  I've always blown it off because of the source.

Ok, so now my EX is contacting all of my former students who have left due to moving, graduation, life commitments, you name it.  The point is, none of these people left on what I thought was bad terms.  Now it is coming back to me that after some juicy sensei bashing it’s coming back to me that favoritism is a huge issue in my class.  The people who are considered my favorites are people whom I teach in class and hang out with outside of class.  They are my friends.

Am I wrong to have made friends with some of my longest and most loyal students?  Every school I’ve been in, has had an “inner circle.”  Should I consider the source once again or take it seriously?  If so, what do I do about it?  I can’t really help that these people are my friends at this point.  Like I said, Craptastic!



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